Many, Asked.
"Why the sudden change?
Stop pretending to be good, we know you too well."
Truth is, I'm trying. I may not changed completely. But I'm taking that path.
That path to be close to him. I wanna oblige my duties out of my love to him.
The truth is. I've change ever since my sister's incident & a shocking discovery that I just encountered about myself. It left me thinking & finally Allah answered my prayers. I want to succeed in both "Dunia" & "Akhirat".
I wanna be ready when I'm sent. When death takes me away. I wanna be prepared.




Lately, I've occupied my time by going to Public Talks.
An Islamic one. It woke me up completely.
It all taught me something. Something which I should've realized sooner.
I wanna attain so much knowledge that I'm able to conceive the idea to the youths that are stranded in disbeliefs about our religion. I will attend courses, volunteer in ways that i can. And I really wanna b fluent in Arab & being able to recite the Qur'an with ease.
I wanna bring back the Sunnah's that our beloved Rasul'lullah s.a.w had left us. I wanna make them realize, the world is coming to an end. All the signs are laid in front their oblivious eyes to be seen. If you don't repent now. You will only do when you realized its too late. I know its hard to suddenly change. But look around you, look at all the signs that states in the holy Qur'an. Contemplate yourself & reflect everything that you've done. Are you just satisfied with the things you do well on earth? It alot different when you die. Its way different. If you don't start now. it all be too late. I'm not here to judge or being arrogant about me changing. I'm here to remind, & it is my duty to do so. I'll be glad to help. And I'm always be willing to help. I will always pray for my friends, families & my whole generation of Muslims, The whole world. May we all be as One Muslims.




One important reminder I learnt from the talks, Your heart is the most powerful gift that is created in your body. W/o it you're nothing. Cleanse your heart, cause mostly everyone's heart is full of garbage. It really is.
I realized, we are all hypocrites. We only turn to Allah when we in desperation. We do SINS as if its a DAILY ROUTINE-_-  We don't abide to his obligations, Why should he?
WHY!?
CAUSE HE IS GOD ALMIGHTY
HE WILL ALWAYS FORGIVE
I done a lot of bad things in the past, I'm NOT saying I've totally change. I'm changing day by day. I wanna learn the true meaning of Humility. Putting Allah above me, following the ways of Nabi Muhammad s.a.w taught us.
Cause if I wanna change someone, I have to do it first. I felt so ashamed.
We are Muslims, aren't we? But still we do things Allah hate most. We gave in to Satan.
Assumption
Most of us like to assume. We don't have the facts but we're so confident that its true.
And from there it equals to Accusation. Its all starts from the Whispers of Satan.
I struggle everyday in life(jihad) fighting this temptations. I'm one of them. May Allah s.w.t forgive me.
Its merely impossible. But I won't back down.
I'll keep fighting.



This is a message I wanna spread to the world. Your heart is full with garbage. Cleanse it before it consumes you. Purify your heart by being sincere to everyone. Learn to be humble inside. When this happens. You will feel peace at heart. Cause our heart is fill with Hate,Lies, Deception, Angst, Jealousy, All the Cruel Temptations from the Evil Satan. I know its hard. But if you let it win. It'll win over you.


I realized so many things.
My life's a mess now. But I'll keep moving on.
I wanna get close to him(Allah s.w.t) & meet his beloved(Nabi Muhammad s.a.w) in "Jannah".
I'm living in fear everyday knowing things are not the way i want it to be. But I'll keep moving.
May everyone realized that we all came to "Dunia" for a reason.
Realize before its too late.

The Prophet (SAW) said "the exercise of religious duties will not atone for the fault of an abusive tongue.
A person cannot be a Muslim till his heart and tongue are so."(Islamic Thinking)

"When you have taken a decision, put your trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who put their trust in Him." (3:159)

























P.S: I'm not mad at you, I just need to believe.

      And I want you to be happy

Well this past few days has been hectic.
Especially yesterday.
Got to do so many things.
After receiving shit in the morning.(Seriously LONG, LONG DAY-_-)
Went to certain shops to find this certain dvd.
Searched the internet, went to the shop itself. OUT OF STOCK-_-
Maybe the film was not that famous, but the film is really nice.
Never watched it before of course^^. But someone said its nice. So I'll keep finding till I get it.
Seriously, it was  really hard to find. But ain't giving up.
Then accompany my crazy cousin "Haziq" to Jurong Poly, paid his dues.
We thought its gonna be a huge sum. But it hasn't increased ever since. It was still the same amount-_-.
But now felt at ease. Cause we must pay our due or debts. You'll feel uneasy if we prolong our dues.


Then at night. We went to Almukminin Mosque. After isyak prayers. We attend an Islamic Talk.
From Ustaz Ahmad Dahri. He was really funny. He state out facts. How we must rebuild Muhammad's s.a.w sunnah's. Its almost gone. We must bring back what he left for us. It was really heart warming.


Now, I'm officially in love with a GUY.
His love is not like any other.
His loyalty is far immense for anyone to stand
His words are beyond anything we could think of
He is our beloved Nabi Muhammad s.a.w


From now on, I'll try my best to be close to you.
I don't have much time. But I will try.
May everyone realized how fragile the world is now.
May they opened their hearts to God Almigthy, Allah s.w.t


I wanna watch Khurafat, but no one to watch with.
Nevermind.Alone can too:)


Thats all I have for now



Its when all the lines are broken
Its never straight
No matter how much
You try
It will be Break Even
HSS


















P.S: Even in this very minute
       I'm trying
       This heart kept beating
       Maybe its the right thing, maybe its not
       Maybe its for the best
       Its impossible to erase
       I will try
       But what matters is her happiness
       May you be blessed with happiness always.

Its about 'I' too

Cause when you put them together

Its about YO'U' & 'I'.

HSS

As you can see, I've deleted my old blog. I hate looking back at my past.
I was not myself. I kept pretending. I'm writing the present, making my new present.

So as you guys can see. I've not start working yet. Working with relatives, friends..
That was temporary. They need help. I come to the rescue. So sometimes only I'm OKB.hha
I wanna go back to school, too late for the application.. Have myself to blame. Cause if i really want it.. I would already be prepared to apply. But there are still different options which i may narrow my options.

I'm sick of just saying things that i can't accomplish. I just say that I'll make it happen, But it never did. I kept delaying time. I'm sick of that. Sick of what i have become. So as you can see on my header, I wanna make that happen.

The year before, 2010; was a drastic one. The year i will never forget. Mostly everything was bad, bad, bad.My sis got "SICK". I fell in love got hurt, fell in love again, got hurt again. mostly every time I got hurt. I endured quite long. Until recently I realized. How stupid I was.
If you really care. Show. Words can be deceit. Words can't prove anything. There's a saying, Action speaks louder than words. It really is.You can wait for the person you love most, But time waits for no one.
But I'll still wait, Cause having feelings brought you to certain extends of limits beyond what you can imagine.
Its called love.

I realized so many things. 2010 has taught me a lot of things that i learnt.
It taught me:
True friendship,
True Colours of people
Meaning of Life
The Limit of Love
Being Persistent
Persevering through Struggles(jihad)
&
Awoken me
(Being closer to My Religion. God;Allah s.w.t)

I'm thankful for all this. It somehow made me complete. But i still have alot to learn. I have to disciplined myself. I know i still lacked alot of things. I need to be prepared. Cause time is short for everyone. Especially me. Time is so precious to me now. I wanna do everything that I can in this time that has given to me. I'm grateful to be alive. I was shocked to discover something. I never thought it will happen to me. But I know everything has it reasons. We plan it, God confirms it. So I wanna do everything that I possibly can.

So far the start of the new year has been quite pleasant.
1st of new year. All the teens went to "clubbing", Watch fireworks and all.
Me, My Cousin & his Friends, we went to the CEMETERY.
It was fun. Didn't saw "MAHLUK HALUS", but similar to that.Really had fun. We made videos, take pictures, bicycle broke down, walked to the four cemeteries on foot with our bikes.
Me & my cousin decided we took the cab, while the rest cycled to Mc'D at Pioneer Mall(Our Destination).

So obviously, we arrived first. Danial & Afiq got chased by dogs. Danial almost hit by a truck.
All I can say. "WE REALLY HAD FUN!".HAHA. After eating at Mc'D's., went to cousin's house to bathed & straight to WORK!. It was the most tiring new year I ever had. But it was worth it.
We delivered to and fro, supplies of wedding food. The best thing, it rained oh so heavily:)
But it was really fun. When it comes to night. I was knocked out. Slept so early for the first time ever.

Alright. That's about all that I penned down.
I'm grateful to be alive.
Days are numbered, But I'll make the best of it.